Benny has major separation anxiety

[LeahO]

Do you have more than one dog? I know this is posted somewhere, but I can't find it! Sorry for the redundancy.

We brought Ben home late December from a family who kept him outside with a pack. He was the smaller, shy one of the bunch. I was with him 24/7 for about a week and a half and then went back to school. Anyway, we have a very unpredictable schedule. Some days he's alone for 2 hours (between my husband and I) with Tuesday being our worst day - 2-3 hours in the morning with with a 2 hour break for playing & walking & then 4 hours more alone. He's almost 5 months & largely potty trained. The trainer said not to risk it and crate him when we're not here anyway.

We've been in and out of the vet on at least a weekly basis trying to figure out why Ben itches all his fur off. I think there's an anxiety component to it. The rest of the story is for another post.

I went to the store the other day, putting him in his crate full of praise, treats and toys and came back in about 10 minutes. Before I opened the door I heard him barking - he was very upset, barking a mile a minute. Does he do that every time?? After some investigation, it seems he does.

It's been a few months, he's nearly 5 months old & I think he should have adjusted. I'm thinking it would help if there was another calm animal around during the day. I'm not really a cat person, but I guess we could get one. More on my mind is another dog.

Getting a Newfy and reading all about them has been a guilt ridden experience for me, but reading the nice posts on this forum I'm now thinking that leaving him alone for a few hours is not mean. People I talk to about it have said they leave their dog home while they have normal 8 hour days, BUT they have all had other dogs around.

... do you? Should I get an older Newfy from a rescue or breeder?

Thanks for any advice!


LeahO

 

[sendchocolate]

Leah, Poppy has a bit of separation anxiety, but what I did was go in and out, all day long, coming right back. I would take the garbage out, come back. It desensitized her, at least some. Does he go in the crate any other time besides when you leave? Does he view the crate as a safe place?

Try feeding him or treating him in the crate. You want it to be a place that doesn't immediately signal, OH NO! THEY'RE LEAVING ME!! Leave it open and put toys, bones, treats in it. Make the crate a happy place.

The other thing we do when we leave, and even still do this, because we do crate Poppy when we go, even though she is over a year... we leave the tv on for her. Used to be a 3 hr long Doctor Who episode.... now it is the Golf Channel (usually pretty mellow) or even just the music from the sattelite station... Broadway Hits, because it has some talking. My husband thinks I am a loon. I probably am. But it seems to help.

We also put her in the crate periodically, just because. It helps her to be used to it, and it is her place. Between that, and systematically desensitizing her from my leaving, it helps.

OH! We also don't make a big deal out of leaving or arriving. We just leave, and come back. We put her in the crate a few minutes before we leave, to help her get used to the idea. We don't take her out immediately within walking in the door, unless we have been gone a long time and I know she has to go to the bathroom. But we are pretty low-key with the whole thing, and she deals pretty well.

Now. Don't ask how it goes if I am in the other room and she is in the back room with my husband and can hear me! She jumped to the top of the door frame the other day trying to get out to get to me! He said it was crazy.

 

[Pregreen]

Boy do I know separation anxiety. I had a dog at one time that trashed my entire house, doors, walls, window sills, shower curtains, furniture all kinds of fun stuff. He never had anxiety as a youngster, it didn't become an issue until much later in life. I can tell you that never once did he scratch or pull his fur out. What tests has your vet run as far as looking for skin issues? The scratching may be a parasite problem or food allergy. I don't think 10 minutes of barking in his crate would automatically make me jump to separation anxiety. Have you tried turning on a fan and a radio or the TV when you're gone? Maybe you can look into doggy daycare for those times that you are gone for long stretches of time. Five months old is still a baby and he's only been with you a short time, I wouldn't bring another animal into the house until you know what you're dealing with. Hang in there and best wishes to Benny.

 

[ardeagold]

Welcome to the forum!

My answer is Yep, get another dog. That's why we have our own canine pack. LOL

Actually it DOES help a great deal especially if a dog is used to being part of a pack. You just have to be careful about the dog you get. He has to get along with him/her.

But, really...ONLY do it if you can care for both and WANT two. Eventually he'll come around with training and time. It takes some of them MONTHS to become secure in their new homes but as a puppy, he should adjust quickly.

Going to obedience classes will help make a bond between you, plus will begin to give him more confidence.

He's still just a young puppy. Newfs grow in size quickly, and it's sometimes hard to remember they're still puppies. 5 mos old is VERY young for a Newf. I think it'll work out if you get him out there...socialize him...go to classes...etc. It's important that he learns that the world can be a fun place, and learns to work through his fears. They ALL go through fear stages, but as long as you don't pamper him...just go about your business and always keep a happy voice with him when he seems scared, he'll understand it's alright.

I could never keep Frankie in a crate. He was a screaming, barking, lunatic for hours. Fortunately one of us is always home, so we could always have him with us or put him in a safe room. He didn't mind an xpen...but he sure hated the crate.

And we have dogs...LOTS of them. Didn't matter when he was in that crate. He wanted OUT.

Best of luck with him...and it WILL get better. Just keep at it.

 

[R Taft]

Yep...get another dog.

Ditto....they are a pack animal

And an older rescue, whatever the breed sounds wonderful........

 

[Newfobsessed]

As Donna said, IF you WANT another dog, then get one, after making sure they get along and I've always been told to get a dog who is slightly less active/calmer than yours. If you do not want another dog, and the wonderful suggestions you have gotten don't work, please post again. I have the book "The Dog Who Loved Too Much" at home. It has a great section on separation anxiety and I will gladly copy that chapter and email it to you. Best of luck!!!!

 

[KodysGrandma]

For over 30 years now we have always had many- minimum of 5, high of 21, currently 10 (all rescues). Some have been a little anxious when they came but it vanished almost immediately. We firmly believe the older ones communicate "it's OK, they'll be back and you'll always have food and water, just settle down". And they do.

 

[mcjhannon]

Hi there, I don't have much to add on separation anxiety but I do see you're in Portland also. I'm not sure what area you're in but I do have a good recommendation for a doggie daycare if you're interested. Also, we love our vet and how they take care of our newf so if you're looking for a vet I can get that to you. Welcome to the site, love your dog's name!

-Katie

 

[Kay]

We only had one dog for over 4 years before we got Nicky, but he went to doggie daycare now and then and that seemed to give him the outlet he needed with other dogs. Be realistic about what is going to work best for you. If it's two dogs, I can tell you that two dogs does not seem to be twice the work (which was a concern of mine) and our Newfie girl (close in age to yours) is wary of new situations and does seem to look to our lab for guidance. That being said, our lab did well as an only dog too, so I don't think you have to have two.

But the fur thing would worry me and is worth investigating/understanding.

 

[cmattson]

When we first brought Ludo home he was 9 months old. His previous owners had never really left him alone before (he was ALWAYS with them) and he had absolutely never been crated, except as a very young pup for a very short time. So, naturally, when he came to live with us a few months ago, we had some separation anxiety issues.

Since we have two resident cats, we had put up a baby gate to separate them and allow for a more gradual introduction between everyone. Well, if we were out of his sight and he was behind the baby gate and couldn't follow us for more than a few SECONDS, he would bark uncontrollably and with this very panicked tone and would continue barking for as long as we were out of his sight. At night, he was (is) crated and the first couple of weeks he would bark all night long or for hours at a time. Same thing if he was left alone at home or in the car when I ran into the grocery store.

We did the same sorts of things to help him with this issue -- went in and out of the house frequently during the day so he could get used to the idea of us leaving and seeing that we'll come back. We would put him in his crate more frequently with food or treats or toys just to get him used to being in there and associating it with positive things (and not just us leaving). He also comes in the car with me any time I go to run errands and some days comes to work with me. Recently, he has become much more independent when we are home (he doesn't CONSTANTLY follow me around like he used to) and is better about being in another room without us and sleeping in his crate at night (though he would most definitely rather be wherever we are).

He still has some issues and once and a while will bark if he doesn't want to be left alone, especially if I'm not around (I travel for work and when I'm gone over night he barks, even with my partner at home), but he has gotten a lot better in just the few months that he's been with us.

 

[NinaA]

Have dealt with this before, too. If you would like another dog, I'd rescue one. It doesn't need to be a Newf, but an older (older as ine 2-5) dog that is calm will make a big difference. Mine (4 at the moment) actually care fore each other. They always train the young dogs, and makes the whole job of raising a puppy easier on you. It certainly will help. It won't necessarily cure. All the suggestions above are good ones. Also remember that this is a baby and she will be a baby for at least another year.

 

[LeahO]

Thanks all! You all are great! Sometimes it seems like the only advice I get from those around me is "he's just a dog - feed him and leave" :darn: I prefer to play with him & shower him with gifts and praise.
I'm a little obsessed. You can tell we're a young couple without kids.

It's true - there are much worse separation anxiety cases; it's just major for me. You made me realize that indeed there was a distinct message of "get in the crate, I'll give you everything you desire and quickly leave"! We're starting to put him in the crate at random times. We put on a very mellow radio show when we left him last night for dinner (which we haven't done in a while because he was so distraught) and although I didn't hear him barking, he was panting when we came back. It will probably take some time to break the association we created. Sometimes I feel like he would just do better being in the house loose, but he'd probably have accidents & be hard to train later.

I'm a little timid about doggy day care after taking him to the parks 1-2 times per week. It seems that he picked up some bad habits; like barking, humping, growling and being kind of rough. Maybe a puppy daycare... We met a Newfy of the same age who was very sweet & much larger (and actually referred me to this lovely forum) and the poor little guy left bleeding from his gums - no doubt an accidental mouthing, but it made me worry about how rough Ben is so we quit the dog parks for now. I'd periodically have to separate dogs not good with puppies anyway & one time a dog straight up attacked him! Not good socialization. I do want him to swim though & some of the fancier dog parks here have chemical free pools. Tried those?

Its funny - I read your replies to my husband, who sort of wants more of a watchdog to compliment our gentle boy.
Me: "See? So maybe we should get the other dog now, love."
Him: "What do you mean - we weren't really planning on getting another dog before."
Me: "Yes we were... weren't we?"
Him: "You're crazy."

Yet to be determined. He's worried about keeping track of both of them when we go to the beach or camping, etc. And carting them places.

He's really uncomfortable now though. For some reason he started fighting the leash... kind of playing, but it sure looks aggressive, and he broke a puppy canine tooth! The vet said he was in pain, so we opted to have it removed even though he's about to lose it. Since he was under anyway we had him neutered and the vet, who is totally dumbfounded by the itching, suggested a biopsy (which, being a ND student, I do all the time on people). I thought 1 stitch, tiny punch - I'd do it to myself if I'd been itching a month and a half, so... Then he comes back with 4 punch biopsies all over his belly!! Not to mention one of them was right in his armpit, so of course it's going to get infected if I didn't know about wound care. Anyway, that's a side note because I think he's in a weird space right now & it's more about making times I can watch him like a hawk without the cone on than loneliness & anxiety. Now I know what it feels like to think you don't know anything and a doctor will save your baby. I swear, I don't think I'll go to the vet again unless there's a bone to set, ruptured tendon or massive wound. And I'd love to know the local Newfy vets in Portland/Newberg if you know of them Katie, especially those with alternative ways of thinking (like treating the cause & not going to meds/surgery for everything).

Alright, this post is officially too long - I know!

It's so nice to be here - thanks again for all of your insight!

LeahO

p.s. if we did get another dog, how does that even work when we leave? Puppy goes in the crate because of potty training and the older dog roams around free? I guess if we make the crate a happy place again it wouldn't be so bad for him. Will the older dog help to train in that respect? (I'm with you on the older rescue)

 

[Kay]

p.s. if we did get another dog, how does that even work when we leave? Puppy goes in the crate because of potty training and the older dog roams around free? I guess if we make the crate a happy place again it wouldn't be so bad for him. Will the older dog help to train in that respect? (I'm with you on the older rescue)

When we leave both dogs are left on the first floor. The older dog (ours is nearly 5) roams free and the puppy is crated. We tend to give each a peanut butter kong before we leave and they LOVE that so it doesn't seem to be a problem. At this age crating them keeps them safe too.