NKlein
Member
I finished reading this book a few weeks ago and it really made an impression on me. In fact, it made me feel pretty guilty, haha!
I've always been so focused on training, obedience, making sure Byron listened to me in even the most distracting circumstances (namely, the dog park). Byron isn't alpha at all, yet I always made sure to go through doorways first and assert myself as the pack leader.
The author of Merle's Door contends that in the wild, non-alpha wolves prefer equality. He makes a strong point for allowing your dog to think independently and listening to your dogs needs, so that you're both happy.
I remember when Byron was a pup, we created a communication so that he would let me know if he was hungry, thirsty, needed to potty, etc. (I just ask him "Are you hungry? If no response, then "Do you have to potty?"--this almost always got a response because it meant going outdoors, haha). Anyway, our dog behaviorist said that this was a big no-no because it put the dog in control. WE should be the ones telling him what to do, etc.
It seems to be argued, however, that for non-alpha dogs it's not such a bad thing for you to cater to what they want, so long as it doesn't create any unhealthy behavior.
All this time I thought I was doing the right thing by being dominant and now I fear that my dog just thinks I'm a bully and has lost all of his ability to think independently! Good thing we don't have any human kids, I'd probably be the worst parent ever!
Anyway, I've stopped being the dominant mama and have really just started to enjoy being my dog's equal. I've started to focus more on what he likes (for instance, I realize now he liks to eat later than I've always fed him), I take a lot more walks with him off leash so that he can sniff things at his leasure and just enjoy himself. I even let him up on the sofa whenever he wants. If he likes it, why not? I feel like we're both happier and think that when the next dog comes along, I'll change some of my behaviors.
Anway, sorry for the long post, I was just wondering if anybody else has read this!
I've always been so focused on training, obedience, making sure Byron listened to me in even the most distracting circumstances (namely, the dog park). Byron isn't alpha at all, yet I always made sure to go through doorways first and assert myself as the pack leader.
The author of Merle's Door contends that in the wild, non-alpha wolves prefer equality. He makes a strong point for allowing your dog to think independently and listening to your dogs needs, so that you're both happy.
I remember when Byron was a pup, we created a communication so that he would let me know if he was hungry, thirsty, needed to potty, etc. (I just ask him "Are you hungry? If no response, then "Do you have to potty?"--this almost always got a response because it meant going outdoors, haha). Anyway, our dog behaviorist said that this was a big no-no because it put the dog in control. WE should be the ones telling him what to do, etc.
It seems to be argued, however, that for non-alpha dogs it's not such a bad thing for you to cater to what they want, so long as it doesn't create any unhealthy behavior.
All this time I thought I was doing the right thing by being dominant and now I fear that my dog just thinks I'm a bully and has lost all of his ability to think independently! Good thing we don't have any human kids, I'd probably be the worst parent ever!
Anyway, I've stopped being the dominant mama and have really just started to enjoy being my dog's equal. I've started to focus more on what he likes (for instance, I realize now he liks to eat later than I've always fed him), I take a lot more walks with him off leash so that he can sniff things at his leasure and just enjoy himself. I even let him up on the sofa whenever he wants. If he likes it, why not? I feel like we're both happier and think that when the next dog comes along, I'll change some of my behaviors.
Anway, sorry for the long post, I was just wondering if anybody else has read this!
